Words. News. Articles. Conversations. TV. Movies. Radio. Music. Commercials.
An overwhelming influx of information distracting me from my own thoughts and feelings. Not enough moments of silence to process and evaluate myself, where I am in life, and where I want to be.
I fear that I will never relive the adventures of EAP VN, exploring new cities and meeting new people with utter freedom and not tied down to anything. It was an experience I will never forget. But at any moment that I am living and breathing, I can still see the world. I should not fear as long as there is breath, life, and health in my body.
I fear that I will be abandoning the family business with not enough structure, help, and support to sustain itself. But I shouldn't because it has survived 23 years without me and can and will continue. I fear that I will leave my mom and sister to deal with the mess and the stress. But I need to remember that I can be replaced.
I fear that I will disappoint my partner. He aches for change, with inspiration and motivation, and I don't know where to start. He needs more understanding, empathy, connectedness, and sacrifice and I'm scared I can't be all that he wants. I'm scared I simply just don't have it in me.
